Lost and Found

Hello out in blog world. I have officially become Lost and Found. Yes it seems I was missing for 21yrs out of my father's side of the family life and they now are overjoyed to have found me. Honestly, I was never missing. I was in BK my whole damn life and ever since my parents divorced when I was 6, i have heard nothing from these people. Not a word, a whisper or fucking carrier pigeon to just say hello. So now after all this time, they wanna play nice. Believe me, i don't mind but I wonder what the ulterior motive is. Someone sick, Someone Dying? what. what could possibly make you look for someone that was never lost to begin with. My response has been cordial and honest. That's how i was raised. and yes I can be truly forthcoming when I want to be. I have experienced too many people fucking with me and my feelings and then when I lash out , then all of a sudden I am too fucking judgemental. FUCK YOU. thats all Peace

Wondy day Yesterday

Hello out in Blog land. Just wanted to share. I shot with a wonderful Model yesterday I lovingly call my" Super fly Diva" Meagan is amazing and so easy to shoot. She is a natural poser with an amazing spirit. I also got to work with one of my favorite makeup artists Glasslips .. extremely talented young lady. I think the shoot went great but Hey I'm Biased :)

Happy Day

Good Morning Blogland.. I am very giddy these days for various reasons. One , I am engaged . 2, I get to be a bridesmaid in my best friend's wedding, 3, my hunny is here 4) I have found renewed happiness in trying to grow as a person, 5) rekindling old friendships with those I treasure, 6) got new lights to shoot with and last but not least that everyone I know is happy, alive and well. It is amazing when you begin to change yourself for the better and realize that you can change old habits should you choose to and not follow a script

WOO HOO.. So Proud of my 16 yr old Muse

My Lil lovely Bryanna Nicole is making the rounds to the agencies. So far she has done a test for MC2, Has seen Elite( whos wants her to test) and Major loved her. She will be going on open calls tomorrow. I hope she gets signed and starts working right away. She has a wonderful face and great spirit.. GO BRYANNA GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A new Site I found that is quite interesting

http://www.hotghettomess.com/index.php Dont be deceived by the title and take a look. You may be surprised

To Be Like who?!?!?!

Hello in blogland. As a photographer, you come across many individuals. Those who are photographers, those who are models, those who are makeup artists, those who are hair stylists, those who are wardrobe stylists, those who are Art and photo editors of magazines. To make this a career, you will have to come in contact and get along as best as you can. Now, I can say honestly I have met those who I would love to work with again and those who I absolutely wonder what their true agenda is. After all, there is enough out there for everyone, but timing is everything. Also in this business so is your reputation is also on the line. You don't necessarily have to be the best but be the most likable and people will remember you. The only key is your follow through. Some people seem to fall short in that department but I digress. I have never wanted to be like anyone. I just want to be me. I am influenced by what I have seen, but not enough to fully change my personality or shooting style. I do hope people like how I shoot and I do have models who would love to work with me again. I also have people that when my first big mag shoot comes, I want them to be part of my team on the project. All that is based on the person I am. I want to share the wealth and the spotlight because everyone I have ever worked with, I am grateful to have done so. I have learned my lesson from those who wish to be shiesty and cheat me, but I had to learn the lesson and for that, I am grateful. Taught me never to act like that. For those I have seen act like pre-madonnas on sets, have told me who never to work like or work with again. To those who feel the need to show off, I have learned be thankful and be humble. I am truly happy for the 2 years of serious shooting has taught me. I hope one day to shoot for magazines, have a huge clientele roster and also have a happy and healthy family as well. That is all

Courtesy of reading Dear Abby Today

The object of life is not to be "happy." The object of life is to make society a better place in which to live. Every one of us has something to offer. In the words of G.B. Stern: "Both optimists and pessimists contribute to our society. The optimist invents the airplane and the pessimist the parachute."

New Images

Just wanted to put a few from my shoot on Sunday July 1st

Break

Hello Blog land I have put myself on a lil break from taking pictures and decided to enjoy NYC as well as learn some things I haven't learned. I live such a culturally diverse city yet i only care about my own world. It makes sense but it also doesn't help to appreciate the world around you. i will be taking in museums and doing my own tours of NY just to see what i can find. I'm such a walker who knows what I may find :)

" I HAVE THE POWERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Good morning in Blogland. I have just been blessed today with the power over people. That's right. I have been given this at 8:45 am this morning. It was given to me and now I realize how weird this is. It is weird to have power especially when given to you. The power to make people show themselves to you at any moment you are around and tell their whole life and world to you and try to insult you in the process. Funny thing, I dont care about sed induhvidual(thank you Scott Adams) so the fact that they feel to need to make their presence and life known to me is extremely amazing. Peacocking to someone who doesn't care or value you. That my friends is a huge power. And I got blessed with it. I am not sure what do with it though but I guess its fun to have. At least for a lil while. I promise to use for good and not evil. HAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHHAA LMAO :D AS THE JOKER SAID" If you gotta go, Go with a smile"

my Attitude

Your Attitude is Better than 75% of the Population

You have a good attitude. While a realist, you do see the positive side of most things. People love to be around you.

How's Your Attitude?

Another Day, Another 50 cents

Morning Blog Land. I was talking to another photographer about what he charges for press kits and album cover photos. The reason behind the question is due to the fact I got an email from someone requesting rates from me for her music client. Now, normally I would jump at the fact of a paying client. Problem is, I have been shafted by some music industry types before about not liking what was done and all this other madness. In that situation , they could have spoke up, they chose not too. So I let karma deal with them. I have no time for shifty people. So immediately my gut is saying no dont do it. And I listen to my gut. I think the other issue is July is family and personal obligations month so I cant really take on any new clients. So with that said, I will ask her when she needs the shoot done because then it will help me gauge better. I would rather her work with someone right away than to wait on me. Plenty of photographers out in the big city of NY. anyhoo, im done blabbing Jan

Fun shoot Saturday

Hello Blog land.. I wanted to say I had a fantastic shoot saturday. It is always amazing when you work with very cool and very laid back individuals who know it is a job but can still have a good time. Kudos to Joe, Angie , Emily, Magali and Chuck. they made they shoot fantastic. I hope my next shoot will be just as good. I have included a picture from it of Emily. She is represented by ID models. http://www.2nyc.net Have a wondy day all Jan

Nicknames

Afternoon world. the random though today is Nicknames. Throughout my life I have been blessed with various nicknames. Some based on how I look, how I think, what I do and my name on how I look Red-headed diva carrot top red big red red-headed Pimp How I think Diva Bitch What I Do Killa Jan - photographer aka shooter ;-) Name Jay-Nine Nine I do have more personal ones my fave personal Poop- had that since I was born..still answers to it Sweetums- after my fav muppet monster ;-) Bubba- My hubba calls me that Mami- my papi calls me that Please note Papi and Hubba are the same person and I love him Dearly. enjoy your day everyone J

New Day?

Hello out in blog land. I'm not sure if anyone reads this but it helps for me to get some things off my chest. Last week, I made a conscious decision to actually get rid of dead weight in my life. Now usually when I do that, I leave a trail of burned or slightly charred individuals in my path and I usually leave them for dead. Dead in the sense that they are dead in my world. And let's face it, we always end up focusing on ourselves because we have to deal with us in the morning and through out our lives. We as humans do not honestly have to deal with anyone else should we choose not to. But what I have realized is some refuse to be let go. I'm not sure why this. Is it inherent in humans to always deal or have our presence felt by those that do not want to deal with us? Do we always wish to prove a point and show " you are missing out on something". Truth be told, I am not missing out on anything because of who I know, I will always know something. Whether I know it today or tomorrow or in the next life, things present themselves anyway. Now I used to wonder why people let me go and I used to want to rub it in. Today, I honestly don't care. You got rid of me for reasons that make sense to you and I no longer feel the need to make myself known to you. That's life. people move on and I guess I learned, I might as well too. I also think my mindset is a Lil different. I have never craved attention. I was a quiet child and in adulthood, I am still quiet to an extent. I never was the type to make myself known. It kinda just happens and that's not being conceited. It is just something I have noticed. Also, genetically, I seemed to have been made to have attention brought on me. Being 6'1" and a natural red head speaks for itself. So I have decided to get rid of the non-positives in my life. Yes I said non-positive cause I don't like the "N" word :) I got rid of things that are physically, mentally and emotionally draining and gave up worrying about how people live their lives. Its their life so why should I care. yes sounds selfish but I'm being honest. If you serve no real purpose in my life, why should you be there?

Testing with Agency Models

Hi World. Today was my fifth Test with ID models here in NYC. They have a great roster of young ladies. So far I have run into 2 who did not show up. This automatically brought a huge question to my mind. You are supposed to be a model and your job is to show up for shoots and jobs. You are supposed to treat each shoot as a paid one and actually show up. Quiet as it is kept, your reptutaion is on the line here. you can call and let someone you are going to be late but to not call or come up with the reasoning of " My boyfriend broke up with me today and I'm a wreck. GUESS WHAT?!?!? the client who wanted to work with you or pay you, doesnt give a fuck. This is your job. We all have shitty days but there arent many that understand that if you Boyfriend breaks up with you, why you cant come in. I know models who go to castings sick just to show their dedication to their job. So if you really want this as a career, suck the bs and do your damn job. ********the Above picture of one the agency ladies I tested today. Beautiful young lady and has a very bright future cause she has her head on straight*******

Sue Rock Originals

Hi Blogger Family The picture is above is of Model Josie of JSD Talent of Charlotte NC is one of many showcasing the designer Sue Rock's Originals. So far , they feedback from the participants of this shoot has been wonderful. Everyone asking where they can get the pieces.

Pay Attention to me

hehhe I know that got your attention but this is not my plea. This is about someone else always needing attention aka NEEDY BITCH!!! Yea that's right NEEDY Bitch and yes it goes for males too. We all have someone in our lives who is constantly and incessantly needing attention. The kind that borders being on a grown up baby. Heck even babies arent as needy as these people and they cant talk. :) You know their MO You hang with them, deal with them and call them on the regular because at first they seem normal. Notice I said at first. Now as we all know, life can make you crazy get you busy and therefore you dont have as much time for your friends as you would like to have. This is where their neediness kicks in and begins to wear on your life. You stop calling as much, dont hang out no more . Whatever is going on your life is causing you to have less and less time for you let alone anyone else. So what do they do? they text you incessantly. " Where are you? I miss you. Call me" Now at first , you feel bad because you know you should . After all , you were hanging and talking quite a bit. so you call catch up. Let them know whats going on your life and they tell about theirs and you think. All will be well cause after hearing them talk you realize they got some stuff going on too so They wont be too peeved now if you dont call consistently. WOW YOU ARE SO WRONG. Due to the fact you opened up lines of communication again, now they are going to harass you more. This is when you realize this shit is borderline obessive behavior and you decide to keep running from it. Now you really made them mad but they will never let you see it. the texts will continue and so will the emails. They will dare not call cause they know you probably wont pick up the damn phone. Now you got options. You can either change your number(no one wants to but in extreme cases, you better) or choose to ignore. 90% will get the hint and realize that shit, maybe you have a fucking life outside of them and maybe they should get on with theirs. the other 10% will annoy you but the communication will be less and less until it basically stops. Now remember people we are in the internet age which means that if you got myspace, friendster, facebook, HI5, whatever friend site you maybe on , you will run into them and then it will be taken up another notch. But jsut keep focused and handle your business. Your true friends will know that you still love but time is keeping you from them. do they love you still? YES. will they be there for you ? YES. Do they understand that you have a life and miss them. HELL YES. Needy bitch however will not and that is why you keep them at empire state laying on it side arm's length. You got enough shit going on with out somebody trying to draw the attention back to them :) Peace and chicken grease J

AH HA.. I knew I was meant to be a photographer :)

You Are An INFJ

The Protector You live your life with integrity, originality, vision, and creativity. Independent and stubborn, you rarely stray from your vision - no matter what it is. You are an excellent listener, with almost infinite patience. You have complex, deep feelings, and you take great care to express them. You would make a great photographer, alternative medicine guru, or teacher.

What's Your Personality Type?

Hi all. This post is to big up the lovely Sue Rock Below are her links http://suerock.blogspot.com/ http://suerockoriginals.blogspot.com/ She is an extremely talented and Fun individual with an amazing spirit. I will be photographing her line starting in 2 weeks. You will see images from the shoot up here. I am extremely fortunate that god has blessed me in every way and has shown me I do have a talent that people do appreciate. I hope to make Ms. Rock proud for taking a chance on me and hoping it will get her to the next level which she deserves. I am very excited for this prospect and cant wait to shoot her line Peace and Chicken grease from the BK

Morning World and all who live in it

Well since this is my first blog here.. First I wanna say welcome to those that will read this. I will write from time to time just to share some experiences I have as well as random thoughts. I am from Brooklyn NY( that's Right BK BITCHES). I Love NYC and it is a part of me. I don't really think I could have honestly grew up anywhere else. Now, I'm not the hardest chick on the block, but I definitely know that NYC can make you or break you if your spirit isn't the strongest. It is a great Teacher. I come from a single parent home( by choice). My dad was abusive and my mom was not tolerating that so she divorced him when I was younger and I am grateful for it. :) My mom has a strength and a resolve the likes I have never seen and she has helped developed me into the person I am today. I don't tolerate BS from people because I was taught not to and honestly why should any of you? Life itself is too short to deal with self inflicted dramas that people in your life will try and thrust upon. hence why I don't have many friends. That 2 is by choice. It is hard for me to trust but even harder to have a real friend. I mean the friend who you can count on to be there for you. I know some people who don't have the capacity of being a real friend cause they don't honestly know themselves. Those I consider the fringes.. just on the outskirts of your life and you deal with them when you feel like it. Sounds cruel but I bet most of you out there know what I'm talking bout and know the people I'm talking about. Anyhow, enough soap box for this edition. I hope I can get to communicate with some cool people and make some new friends. Have a wonderful Easter J